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Funny Rude Poems and Jokes



Are you looking for funny rude poems and twisted silly poetry? Sometimes even normal funny poems become boring. But rude humorous poems always bring you a great laugh. They are unique and interesting for any age or occasion.

You can share these funny rude poems with your good friends and have a great time laughing together. You can also tease someone in their birthday by writing these silly rude poems on their birthday gift.

Here are some of the top funny poems that are a bit rude and twisted. Enjoy!

1. Funny Rude Poem: Looking at the Sky

Last night I lay in my bed looking up at the stars,
the beautiful sky and the endless horizon
and suddenly I thought where the fuck is my roof?

2. Funny Twisted Poem: I Love the Way

I love the way it rubs against my soft pink flesh
and creates a foamy liquid
as it thrusts in and out up and down
I can't wait for the next time
I love my toothbrush

3. Funny Rude Poem: You're So Sexy

You're so sexy, you drive me insane.
You fuck me so hard I'm always in pain.
Your sexy voice puts in slumber.
Oh fuck I'm sorry I've got the wrong number...

4. Funny Rude Poem: The Lady Next Door

A little boy walks into his parents' room
Then wears a quizzical frown
When he see his Mom on top of his Dad
Bouncing up and down.

The mother quickly dismounts,
Worried about what her son saw
She dresses quickly and goes to find him.
Standing outside the door

He asks, 'What were you doing to Dad just then?'
She replies, 'Well, you know Dad is fat
He has a big tummy so sometimes
I get on top and make it flat.'

'Well, you're just wasting your time, Mom,'
She is told by her bright young pup
Cos when you got out, the lady next door
Gets on her knees and blows it back up.'

More Funny Rude Poems for You

Enjoyed the above humorous rude poems? Then you can find even more free funny poems below. Choose any of them you find most interesting and feel free to share it with your partner or friends to get a good laugh. Enjoy!


5. Cute Funny Poem: Nuts About You

I'd like to scuttle your puttle
Spiddle your paddle
Tickle your wickle
And twittle your taddle

Stroodle your doodle
Cromple your string
Brundle your strundle
And frondle your ding

See, I told you I'm completely nuts about you.

6. Funny Rude Poetry: Cheating Mommy and Daddy

Mother returned from 2 days away
Her little boy greeted her by saying,
"Mummy, guess what! Yesterday!
I was in your wardrobe, playing

Daddy came in with the lady next door
And their clothes started to drop
And they lay undressed on the bed
And then daddy climbed on top ..."

Mother held up her hand.
"Not another word. That story's bad
Exactly what you've just told me."
I want you to tell to Dad

As Dad walked into the house,
His wife said, "I'm off. I'm packed already, see? "
"But why--" asked the startled father.
"Sonny. Tell him what you told me."

"Well," Sonny said, "I was playing in your wardrobe
And daddy came in with the lady next door
And they got undressed
And all their clothes were on the floor

And they got up on the bed
And then they did that thing
That you did with Uncle John
When daddy was away, last Spring."

More Short Funny Poems?

Looking for more funny poems for various occasions? You can find more free poems here. Check them out now and enjoy!